Thursday, May 26, 2005

drive me crazy...etc..

ive been trying to rack my brains thinking what possibly could have been so interesting three days ago that i tried so desperately to type out and publish on my blog. i just cannot remember!

so i will tell you the story of my life these days!..... no!!!! please dont leave! :o)

the only thing of a relatively lesser amount of insignificance ive been doing lately is brushing up on my driving skills. every morning at six, a certain mr. gangadhar comes to help 'baby' get some driving practice. poor chap didnt realize what he was getting into. but yes. now, after several near misses at pedestrians, almost being run over by a bus, and and a narrowly avoided head on collision with a truck, he realizes his mistake. young mrs. gangadhar must be wondering whats happened to her dear husbands' head of black hair.
his pupil on the other hand couldn't be happier. someone used to crusing along the bylanes at a modest speed of 20 k.m.p.h. happily zooms along the highway while mr. gangadhar tries his best to signal warnings with his hands... nay, his arms... to the other innocent, totally oblivious, drivers.
(though i must add... this pupil is getting better by the day!! :oD )

after a morning thus well spent, i treat myself to a nice little morning nap. i can sense the bai stare at me sprawled on my bed every morning... eh... what does she know of my morning exertions (excursions?)

now i wouldnt want to waste the entire morning would i? so i get up and make a list of all the things i should do in the day. now, on the days when my taste veers towards the more rustic, i use good ol' pen and paper (i even have a fancy notepad that has a heading 'things to do today' on each page.. but that is used only on special days). when i feel slightly biased towards technology, i use my phone and set alarms for all the to-do's (just to see the flashing lights!! :oD). and when im in my strongest pre-MBA mode, i use an excel spreadsheet. colour coded not less! red, orange, yellow, blue, green in decreasing order of importance. i make time blocks, set deadlines, grade the tasks to be completed and finally go back to sleep.

wake up for lunch, realize ive lost 3 hrs out of my tight schedule and so forget about it altogether (the schedule not the lunch). after lunch i sit down to do what im doing right now (i.e. aimlessly while away my time) for an indefinite period of time.

evening comes. on the days i do manage to make it to the gym, i greet the evening with this feeling of self righteousness. ah! a day well spent. else, i spend the evening with (like minded) 5 yr olds and then say to myself... 'this is what life is meant to be like. i push myself too hard... poor me. i must give myself a break..'

while on the topic of 5 yr olds, i must tell you about my little neighbor boy. not yet 5 but will soon be. and boy! does he have plans for the year. he wants to get married!
he thought it would be ashwini, his best friend from school... but then she did not match his expectations. you see, she was bad at colouring.
so then he looked again. this time he found ishita, his 3 yr old neighbour. now here was a girl who could colour.

he told his mum,

'i want to marry ishita after my 5th bday'

'you cant only ask me you have to ask her mother too'

our hero goes to her mother

'auntie, i want to marry ishita'

'beta you have to ask her yourself'

the kid is not prepared for this

'how should i ask her?'

all the young aunties now begin to kid him... 'you have to sing and dance for her to say yes'

so this little fellow actually, in front of all his friends and all the aunties (who wouldnt miss it for the world) sings and dances to 'mujhse shaadi karogi'!!!!!

he even has plans for his life, rather their life, after marraige. he will cook, he will clean and he will go to work. all ishita will do is colour!
poor chap was extremely disappointed on being informed that it was illegal to marry before the age of 21. he stood thinking and finally whimpered 'but that is so far away!'

awww..... and you thought romance was dead!!

Tuesday, May 24, 2005

power struggle

was going to post but the power went out. in fact i entered the lift and the electricity went out. so i climb 5 floors and as the key turns in the lock the power comes back on. sat down to update my blog and the power has gone out again. cant quite see the keyboard so will delay my post by a day (though i dont think there is half a person who cares!!! :oD

Thursday, May 12, 2005

freedom.

a summer morning. two twenty something girls out on a walk at the sanjay gandhi national park, mumbai. it isn't all that early in the morning. in fact its quite bright. hoardes of runners/ joggers/ walkers are on their way out already. a fresh set on their way in.
the air feels clean, smells fresh. its hard to get this in mumbai. trees line both sides of the potholed road, providing shade and much appreciated greenery. there isn't any great threat of wild animals in this part of the forest, atleast not in the day time. so the two girls, feeling rather safe walk along the tarred road. talking, laughing, catching up on the past yr.
they go furthur down the road, past habitation (few tribals, most slum dwellers), past the monkey cage (no monkeys in it.. thankfully they've managed to escape into the forest, where they belong), past the forest museum (or something like that), past the kids park (already full of kids and their parents).
the aforementioned army of runners/ joggers/ walkers has thinned out. it feels nice to be walking in a real forest, right in the midst of a concrete forest (a comment worn out with use!).

alive. young. healthy. independent. adventurous.

enter villain no 1.
creepy guy in black shirt. ogling. staring. following.
the two girls notice him. they ignore him. they had other things to do. nevertheless, they felt a bit weird. it was scary. and to their dismay they realized, they were the only ones on the road. the other walkers had turned back quite a while ago.

a few minutes later they decide to do the wise thing and walk back. creepy guy is still following them at a distance. they walk a little. soon they see the huts of the locals in the distance. habitation.
phew!! its safe now.

"oye"

they turn. its an instant reaction.

a second creepy guy is standing at the side of the road, 10 meters from them. flashing.

shock. fear. disgust.

no room for any other emotion coz the prevailing thought is, 'we have to get out of here fast'

FEAR

newspaper headlines of the past few weeks flash through their minds. 'girl raped in police chowki', 'woman molested in delhi', 'nurse raped in hospital fights for justice'.........................

this must be the same fear they must have experienced minutes before they were scarred for life.

'God please keep us safe'

they leave the place as fast as possible, trying their best to not look scared, stopping only when they reach the kids park 10 minutes later.
(i dont really know if this was the judicious course of action. but when youre on a lonely road with a stalker and a flasher for company, you can be forgiven for not coming up with the ideal response).

upset. shocked. appalled. disgusted. flabbergasted. betrayed. insulted. shaken.

it happened to me.



is it fair that women have to go through this?
everywhere. everyday.
why am i deprieved of my freedom to walk where i please without the fear of being abused?
why am i deprieved of my freedom to spend time with myself without being constantly on the watch for people stalking or staring?
why am i deprieved of my freedom to LIVE, FEARLESSLY?

Tuesday, May 10, 2005

finally

after days, weeks and months spent wondering where i would be; contemplating colleges right from columbia and LSE (in a brief period of optimism) down to this sidey MBA college near my home (those were the days i was really low).... the decision is made. IIM Indore it is.
yay!
so its gonna be hanuman tekri (this hill behind my house is called that - also my bus stop) to hanuman tekri (the location of IIM I).. coincidence!!
and btw, the university thing turned out all right. i went there and the guy says, 'madam it makes no difference to us where you go. form pe toh timepass ke liye college ka naam poocha hai!'
so there!
think ill start a new blog. a proper MBA blog. Life at a b school from the point of view of a........ damn it! i cant think of a single word to describe myself. only proves how long its been since the GDPI's!!

Sunday, May 08, 2005

confused

some great news and some bad news...

great news: i made it thru IIM Indore! (i dont believe it myself... wasnt expecting this at all!!.. which can be proved by the facts under bad bews)

bad news: coz i was not expecting the Indore result to work out, I went and got my migration certificate issued towards XIM Bhubaneshwar. Now if any of the parties are interested in my migration certi... im in a big mess. coz they dont reissue a migration certi. 'Not under any circumstance' (was in the form) so i may by default be forced to take up XIM..

not that i dont want xim, honestly im confused as to which would be better... iim or xim, but i dont want something to slip thru my hands coz of my stupidity and enthusiasm :(

fingers crossed till tomorrow.. lets see what the university ppl have to say.

Friday, May 06, 2005

sidey!!


this post is dedicated to all those who bring joy to our lives and make our otherwise dreary, sad lives worth living.

people love to make statements. be it verbal or non verbal. it's like we feel the necessity to assert our presence. perhaps its a psychological thing, like the necessity to remind ourselves that we're still around perhaps?? - well i'm no student of psychology (its kinda obvious i don’t know a thing about it!) so can't delve much into that. but yes, i am a keen observer of human behaviour... OK, so not all kinds of behaviour. but where a persons conduct veers to the more 'sidey' there i am, all eyes and ears!! ;o) in fact, that is what makes all the difference to my life. my joyless existence takes on new meaning thanks to this spirit of 'sideyness' which gets into just about anybody and consistently provides unparalleled entertainment.


i was walking to my friends place a couple of days ago, and we passed this normal, decent looking, middle aged man walking in the opposite direction; him minding his own business, we minding ours; (nothing interesting at all about this story so far, but see what difference one man can make!) and just as he passes us he emits this huge fart. ( it was so funny, we had to like hold down our laughter untill we were a safe distance away) it could have been a.. greeting (??) 'good evening ladies' or perhaps a statement; 'i am extremely secure about my body and am proud of the sounds it makes'.
in fact i come across several such 'secure' and 'confident' people, almost daily that too. to be honest, you can't really miss them. they're all over the place. on the road, in a bank, in class!!!
like this once, we were having a serious group discussion and the guy sitting next to me made a crappy (note the pun!) point and as if to emphasise it, lifts up one half of his rear and lets out some of his 'trapped gases' (loudly that too) almost as though he were saying 'so there!!!'. we were just thrown aback! ;o)

then there is another class of men (encompassing over 98% of the male population) who are really not that secure. they in fact need to often assure themselves that their 'manlihood' is still intact. its like they’re standing at a railway station and suddenly theyre struck with fear 'is it still there??? all of it??? I’ve got to check RIGHT NOW' and after feeling around their crotch and resting secure with the knowledge that it hasn't run away they wan't to further assure themselves of its sensitivity perhaps (may as well do a complete check - overalling you see), so they scratch. just to be sure they scratch some more, this time with more intensity. and then some more (- for old times' sake perhaps). a satisfied, relaxed smile comes over their face. All's well with the world. They perhaps gain confidence enough to let out some of their own 'trapped gases'. but all this just for the next thirty seconds until fear strikes again and the process is repeated.

i'm sorry for all the male bashing, but women bashing happens all the time anyway.
click here for details on abuse against women.

Wednesday, May 04, 2005

my achy breaky body!

i started off on a workout plan a couple of days ago. now it is said that a good workout makes you fitter, stronger, more agile, gives you great stamina.......
well thats all bull****. im sure whoever said that never lifted a single weight in his/her/thier life.

two days of exercise and my body is sore, i cant move a muscle, standing up hurts and the sight of me struggling to walk is supposedly hilarious (why, even my maid was laughing at me!). only my finger muscles have been spared (however the immobility induced excessive typing at the keyboard/clicking at the mouse may cause my wrists and fingers to stiffen as well) all in all, im far from feeling fitter/stronger/more agile. in fact, i feel as active as a seventy year old. heck no!!! im sure my seventy five yr old grandmother will be able to outrun me now.

moral of the story: exercise is bad for your body. spare your body the torture of weight training.

thats it. i've gotta rush now. actually more like i've got to hobble out of my house. you see, i can't be late for gym! ;o)