prejudice without pride?
nothing to do with the movie actually... though i did see bride and prejudice and notwithstanding what anyone else may say i liked it...(though much could be done about lalita singing almost opera style.. and the ending doing no justice to the book) this post is not a film review.... more of an introspection...
its so easy to judge wrongly (and my sincerest apologies to the person in this context) and keep building on it so much so that ur garbled impression of the person seems more true than the person in front of you... and the weirdest part about it is you would hate it happening to yourself though its almost 100% likely.. now the question is... is this prejudice originating from pride (your opinion cannot be wrong kind of pride)... or out of a natural cautious attitude... caution against perhaps getting hurt later.... (i know im being pretty ambiguous)
anyway... gotta go.. paying to use the net... ie.. still in pune!
pune post!
thats right im in pune.. came here for 2 days... ended up being here for over a week and still here... and honestly i dont know why. i hate this place.. its so dead... is so quiet in the nights and small sounds get magnified... end up sleeping little and having bad dreams the rest of the time... though all this is having a positive impact on my studying.... i end up doing much more coz that keeps my mind from feeling scared!! really!!
but honestly im surprised that im so dependent on having people close to me or rather near me all the time.. for quite sometime i thought i was essentially a loner... preferring to stay by myself most of the time and comfortable with that.... guess its not so... or maybe its more like i need to see people around... dont necessarily want to talk to them... but i guess presence is important... for a sense of security i guess...
guess thats all from my side... dying to be back in mumbai!
blah
would u believe it... people are actually reading this blog...!! now i need to figure out how the counter thing works.... considering my comp skills.... should take me a month!
one more day to go before a well deserved vacation. actually i think i must hold back on the well deserved part. have been having quite a vacation the past 4 months anyway. no wonder then my attendance is at scary levels. but still it feels nice to look forward to 3 weeks of actual, legitimate non working days. feels still better coz i think this is for the first time diwali holidays are not being preceeded by diwali exams... CAT is still there but thats another story.
come to think of it... although i was sooooo grumpy the first few weeks or rather months at MU.... came up with brilliant excuses every morning to skip class...(therefore the aforementioned dismal attendance)... but things have shaped up pretty well. i may even go so far as to say i might miss the place if i do get a chance to leave.... wont yet say i dont wanna leave this place ever but yeah.... its turned out to be a nice surprise!
heres to MU!
no more CAT
bad day... things are loww!! :o( couldnt really study.. and those antibiotics kept me in bed for practically the entire day... waste of a day... but to look at it more positively... a good days rest.. actually been giving my attitude a lot of thought these days... i mean yeah.. i wanna do well in life.. i wanna realize my dreams... i wanna make the most out of life... but CAT is not the be all and end all im making it out to be.... honestly none of my long term plans are based on the corporate world... yeah a good MBA will be a huge help... and perhaps a safe option to fall back on in case my dreams dont really materialize the way i want them to... (heaven forbid!) but looking at the way im all into CAT and etc. its really not healthy... some level of competition is good.... but here i sit and analyse every aspect of my score on the simulated cats and act like a total idiot.. its good to keep track of ones performance but i think the competitive spirit should end there... and honestly... is just a 2 hr exam... how much can i bank on it... should take a break from all this CAT related discussion..
so now i talk about the other things happening in my life........................................................................... cant think of a thing other than the threat of being thrown out of msc for poor attendence looming large... oh my goodness... my life is so boring!!
i am a control freak
todays bombay times (its bombay times not mumbai times yet) carried this article on control freaks... people who like to have everything under control... read it... was a pretty accurate description of me.. cant believe im like that... actually more like i didnt think i was so well classifiable! always thought i was more complex!! ;o)
but i really gotta do something about this... coz i lose my head everytime i see things spiralling out of control.. or even things totally out of control anyway... im well on my way towards a nervous breakdown considering the CAT.. my scores instead of improving have been steadily declining and i have no idea why.... and above that im shit scared about my attendance... theyre gonna kick me out of class soon... and if they dont i think im well on my way to letting myself out of the university by flunking... i wonder of it was a wise decision to take up msc anyway... perhaps i should have just sat at home and studied for CAT alone... i wonder why i didnt give it last year... actually i know why i didnt.. was smitten by the thought of being an academic...! anyway a lot happened in between and i ended up at MU doing my msc in stats (this i really have no idea why i took up)... but i really believe that everything happens for the best..
really dont know which colleges to apply to... spent over 5 grand buying forms and now i really dont know what im doing with them... dont even feel like filling them out coz i heard how SPJ took interviews last yr... it seems pointless to apply.. but again its all for the best!
on that positive note... tata!
woo hoo!!!
finally.... success!
have been trying for ages to get this thing started.... suddenly it decided to work!!
as to why this sudden blogging enthusiasm?? well its kinda like this.. im preparing to give the CAT this yr and one of my inspiration techniques is to read blogs of people at the IIMs... hv been doing that a lot really... and yes have got a lot of inspiration...! which is why i thought id add my own story... (may it prove to be an inspiration to many!)
though right now im in a pretty uninspirationable (if thats a word) state... esp considering CAT... my simcat scores are steadily declining..... doing really really terribly in DI esp... and to top it there are so many other things i have gotten involved in that i cant let go of now... like last week was so hectic in college.. we were organising this talk on election issues and wed got these NGOs to come an speak and two days before the event we finally put out publicity... teribly late anyway... and all of it was vandalized... ripped apart... therefore spent the entire morning doing everything from making banners to running to classrooms begging people to come.... it was mad... i lost my head.... and then star news shows up saying theyre gonna cover it.... we didnt even have audience... it was so scary... finally thankfully it went OK...(star news converted into a news item on student apathy ;o)
anyway the point of the story is things have been so busy... ive stopped considering attending lectures even.... barely enough to keep the req att... if i stop to think of it... its really scary.. the extent to which im relying on doing well at cat and subsequent tests.. im gonna get thrashed at the final exams in coll... will hv to start studying as soon as CAT is done with... we were doing linear models in class today.. definitely one of the most bouncer papers... and i felt so shitty to think of myself sitting in class and not following a thing..... but its too late to give up now... will have to follow it through.. and well... heres to CAT! meow! (hee hee!!)
is this ever going to work?
my umpteenth attemt to publish a post... just never goes through... this is therefore testing....
poor start
i must say that about my first attempt at blogging... wrote a nice long post but when i clicked send... my dear comp didnt respond... tried that twice.... the only time something did get posted was when i mistakenly clicked send with nothing written... therefore the blank post!
anyway.. wont write much about myself yet... twice bitten..... lets try sending and see if something shows up..
