random thoughts...

shaken and stirred

you go about life happily, feeling relatively secure. and then something happens that shakes you. it may be a small thing, maybe even insignificant to many others, but it affects you strongly and things are not the same anymore.
something of that sort happened to me yesterday. and ive spent a lot of time today thinking more about it.
wont keep the suspense.. a tiny letter to the editor in TOI said something about the alleged murder of pope john paul 1 and how in 25 yrs no one has investigated it officially. it was the first time i heard such an allegation. in fact i remember thinking why so little is said of john paul 1. i went online and looked it up. the more i read the more i was appalled. (ref: http://www.prose-n-poetry.com/display_work/10583/ )
how could a religious body indulge in such crimes? in whose name are they doing it? do they even believe in God? its as sad as the entire kanchi sankaracharya scandal.
now im not stupid (surprise!) but for some reason ive always held religious leaders in high esteem (leaders of most religions, not all. some of these new age things are just too creepy to consider respecting... im sorry to say so but im only being honest) anyway, i have always been naive enough to think of these people as special and really good human beings. especially those in the catholic church (given my background) so if they said something, especially with respect to religion etc. i would accept it. atleast most of it. slowly i was being brainwashed into focussing more on ritual and tradition than being a good person. (thankfully i came across tony d'mello's books which kept me in check) you can now imagine the shock i got when yesterday i heard of these scandals. my mum keeps saying 'dont worry so much it happened a long time ago'. but the fact is that it happened. and so it can happen again. and i cannot bear the thought of subscribing to such hypocricy, even unknowingly, and that too in the name of God. (i dont know how many would understand what im trying to say or how significant this whole incident has been. ive expressed myself really badly).
therefore, ive made a decision (something that a person with a standard quantity of brains would have figured out and done ages ago) im not going to rely on someone elses' ideas of morality. i think making your own decisions is difficult coz then the consequences are your responsibility. but on the other hand why must i ever do something unless im convinced in truth that it isn't wrong. and such conviction comes only when the belief is your own and not borrowed.
satyameva jayate!!!

posted by deepti @ 12:57 am